It has taken me quite a while to write a page or a thought for May this year. Perhaps its a sign of life taking on some " normality " or of coming to terms with the passing of Gary and the other things in life now take up my time more. I know it shall never be the way it was when Gary lived amongst us and how could it. To loose a son as Gary, left a world so unknown to me and so awful that we often look back and wonder how we have managed to survive and how we continued living. If I was told two years ago any of this should come about I know that I would have felt insulted and I would have felt the memory of Gary betrayed. But the most normal thing in life is to continue to live and do all the things it takes to do that. Stephen and Lisa are a great reminder of Gary and each have a part I see Gary had. And I shall always be grateful for their help in coming to terms with Gary's passing.
Tonight as I kicked football with Lisa I paused for a moment from time to time and remembered how often Gary kicked ball there. Those same boards the ball bounced off hang their, the same trees still grow, the same faces pass by and indeed the same odd cranky neighbor who objected to the children playing on the street. If only they knew the meaning of life that has been shown to us perhaps some things would be so much different but I know it was us who had our precious son Gary and for that we would not swap the world and our life now.
Gary shall be dead two years in a couple of days and I look back on how quickly time has passed by and it's true what it sometimes said " how short life is and how important it is to live our lives and enjoy what has been given to us". We miss you Gary and remember you always, Love from Mom , Dad , Stephen and Lisa.